What, me worry?

Ever feel like you are part of some large-scale psychological experiment? Like everyone you know is a control subject and you are the test subject? I get that a lot. I'll be at work, checking my cubicle for the hidden cameras, searching my co-workers for "wires", etc. It's like I'm in the book 1984, waiting for Big Brother's minions to carry me away one day, leaving my cube vacant, as if no one was ever there...

Am I paranoid or is the janitor making notes about me behind my back? Is it my imagination or does my boss go through my stuff when I'm not around? Where the hell is this blog going? Point, I need a point and fast. Oh yeah paranoia. Good, sweet paranoia.

Why is it that whenever a cop (even the local po po) pulls behind me, I get the distinct impression they’re going to pull me over? I'll be driving 37 in a 35 zone and I'll drop down to 34, just in case. What the hell is that?

When I go to a fast food place I wonder if any of my meal ended up on the floor at any one point during its creation. The 5-second rule be damned. Or did some snotty fifteen year old foul it up some other way (please, let your imaginations wander)?

I swear that my tire is going to blow, the check engine light is going to come on, or my car is going to die whenever I drive somewhere. I turn the radio down. Did my car just make a clunking sound, or did I go over a bump? Is that smoky smell coming from my Focus, or the polluted red neck wreck of a truck in front of me?

Was that noise down stairs caused by my two cats trying to kill each other or a burglar? Was that just the stupid nut tree dropping shit on my car or some shit head nut job stealing the CDs out of my car?

Time to submerge myself inside the bubble, go to sleep, and think happy thoughts.

*D.S. Trosdahl~~