K.entucky F.ried C.rap

KFC's new ad campaign has gotten on my nerves. So much so, it's time to vent a little. In their most recent commercial a middle-aged, balding man is eating his lunch. A woman walks in and starts heckling him. Apparently he's literally a rocket scientist and he spent $8 at a casual sit-down type restaurant, whilst she went to fancy schmancy KFC and got a meal for $4. She then laughs all condescendingly at him because he's the rocket scientist and he should have known better. Mwa ha ha ha ha ha ha!

Skank.

First of all, if we're going based on quality of food, anyone can dunk a rat in a fat fryer and call it chicken. If I want chicken that tastes like homemade (my wife, by the way, makes a damn fine chicken) I won't be going to KFC. Secondly, in the ad it clearly states, “Beverage not included”. Which means, tack on another buck twenty-five. If tax is also not included, we’re now up near $6.

So take that KFC! And if you ever, ever laugh at me condescendingly again I’ll shove your face in that fat fryer! All right Chili’s, TGIFriday’s, and Rockola, I expect some compensation for standing up for you. I’ll have my people talk to your people.

*D.S. Trosdahl~~

Talentless in Louisiana

Oh god. Did anybody hear Kevin Federline's first attempts at becoming a mainstream Rap Artist? Didn't think so. I get the feeling you will continue not to hear much. Here's a bit of what he has to offer.

"Back then, they called me K-Fed, but you can call me Daddy instead."

"My prediction is that y'all gonna hate on the style we create, straight 2008."

Please make him stop. We're talking about a guy that will be considered the Aaron Carter of the rap world. The Pauly Shore of the acting community. The proverbial Tom Arnold of comedians. This guy's fifteen minutes have already come and gone. The only reason you still see him is the fact that he's grasping Britney's coat tails so hard the Paparazzi can't get a clean shot of her without him. If anyone buys this crappy album, called "the truth", coming out next year, each of them should be methodically shot. The Truth? The Truth is Kevin the amount of space you've taken up in this blog is more than you are worth. DTroz out.



Isn't that the guy that use to sleep in the dumpster outside my old apartment?
*D.S. Trosdahl~~

What, me worry?

Ever feel like you are part of some large-scale psychological experiment? Like everyone you know is a control subject and you are the test subject? I get that a lot. I'll be at work, checking my cubicle for the hidden cameras, searching my co-workers for "wires", etc. It's like I'm in the book 1984, waiting for Big Brother's minions to carry me away one day, leaving my cube vacant, as if no one was ever there...

Am I paranoid or is the janitor making notes about me behind my back? Is it my imagination or does my boss go through my stuff when I'm not around? Where the hell is this blog going? Point, I need a point and fast. Oh yeah paranoia. Good, sweet paranoia.

Why is it that whenever a cop (even the local po po) pulls behind me, I get the distinct impression they’re going to pull me over? I'll be driving 37 in a 35 zone and I'll drop down to 34, just in case. What the hell is that?

When I go to a fast food place I wonder if any of my meal ended up on the floor at any one point during its creation. The 5-second rule be damned. Or did some snotty fifteen year old foul it up some other way (please, let your imaginations wander)?

I swear that my tire is going to blow, the check engine light is going to come on, or my car is going to die whenever I drive somewhere. I turn the radio down. Did my car just make a clunking sound, or did I go over a bump? Is that smoky smell coming from my Focus, or the polluted red neck wreck of a truck in front of me?

Was that noise down stairs caused by my two cats trying to kill each other or a burglar? Was that just the stupid nut tree dropping shit on my car or some shit head nut job stealing the CDs out of my car?

Time to submerge myself inside the bubble, go to sleep, and think happy thoughts.

*D.S. Trosdahl~~